[ he opens his mouth wider under the touch of those fingers; the smile grows mockingly— there are so many things nikolai is hiding but fyodor doesn't care to dissect them just yet. the clown's attachment to him is clear (what fyodor does not know is how his own is present, allowing for nikolai to touch him. ]

I imagine, not many things injure you. But there is more isn't there? Lots of little secrets that built up while we were apart.

[ he kisses the pads of those fingers playfully, but with no true emotion just mimicry. a dysfunction in himself—how he feels and does not feel never factors in. he doesn't know how.

but kolya would know the act now, he's seen after all behind the veil, what fyodor looks like when it's emotion he genuinely feels like— ]

Would you like to clean my messes still?